Bringing Jake Home: Happy New Year

Jake is really adjusting better each day. He is a very happy little guy and is starting to realize that there is "6" of it in his new forever family. He couldn't quite understand in the beginning why we were all here....."shouldn't it just be me and daddy?" was the look he had for the first couple of days. He will now let me feed him, hold him and put him down for his naps and bedtime. He hasn't even cried the last couple of days when he knows it is bedtime.

We are still struggling with his "fits" ...he isn't sure of how to handle his frustrations or anger when things don't go exactly the way he wants them to....his natural instinct from the orphanage is to "fight to survive". They had to be strong willed to keep the toys they had or they might lose it to a bigger older kid! He is still not confident that we are not going to come up to him and take his things....so he will occasionally hit, throw, scream or open his mouth as he might bite. Our other three children never went through this so I am not completely sure of how to handle it! James Dobson to the Rescue!!! I am getting one of his books this week! I am using some of the methods taught to us through Growing Kids God's Way and they have been working. We used them on our other children and had much success with them. It is what we used on the bedtime training with Jake and he got it in two days! We have been correcting Jake in his fits and then he turns into a "noodle" and scoots across the floor screaming. Wow! It can be overwhelming at times but I have been staying very calm and helping him work through it. I know it sounds like he is having a hard time but I need to make myself clear that this has gone from numerous times a day to no more than 2-3 times a day. Most of the time he plays just fine and is very happy, giggly and cuddly. He will actually leave Rick long enough to go into the other rooms and play with the other children on his own and he has fun!

Today is my first day with Jake alone! Rick had to go back to work today and we took the other kids to ma and pa's house to be with all their cousins on New Years. We got home sooooo late last night and Jake is still sleeping! I can't wait to give him all of my attention and to see how he reacts when he has to be "totally" dependent on "mommy"! I pray he fully accepts me and gets an even stronger bond with me this week. Slow and steady wins the race and I am willing to do what it takes. I keep reminding myself that it is hard to trust women when you have been abandoned by your birth mother (for the hopes of a better life), the caregiver in the orphanage he was loved by so much gave him up for a better life (he doesn't understand that yet) SO, why would he trust this other new woman? He has been through a lot and I begin each day and end each day with a prayer for God to soften his heart to completely trust me and to give me the patience he will need from me until he is fully ready to totally accept me.

I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe New Year. We are excited to see what 2008 brings us. We know just having our family complete and together will bring us much joy. May God bless each of you.

Brothers!
Jake says "YEA" and Luke says "Do I have to share all my toys?"